I'm so tired of being here.
Suppressed by all my childhood fears.
And if you have to leave,
I wish that you would just leave.
Cause your presence still lingers here,
and it won't leave me alone.
These wounds won't seem to heal,
this pain is just too real,
there's just too much that time cannot erase.
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears,
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears.
I held your hand through all of these years.
But you still have...
All of me.
You used to captivate me by your resonating mind,
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind.
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice has chased away all the sanity in me.
These wounds won't seem to heal,
this pain is just too real,
there's just too much that time cannot erase.
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears,
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears.
I held your hand through all of these years.
But you still have...
All of me.
I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone.
But though you're still with me,
I've been alone all along.
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears,
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears.
I held your hand through all of these years.
But you still have...
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
love, marriage, books
We were talking y'day about writing letters. You have no idea how much i love writing letters and it gives me immense pleasure to write.
Y'day we had discussed to major issues, one about reading and second about love and marriage.
It is your observation about people reading too much that made me think. I wonder whether some part of my high expectation from life, stems from this belief that we deserve more. But again i may also argue that unless we expect more from life, the drive required to move in this world will be lost. However, the understanding of the difference between "expectation" as a motivational force and one as depressing has to be there. As motivation we must be driven to better things and goals, yet on achieving, or receiving something in life, the expectations should not get in the way of appreciating or being thankful for our gifts.
Secondly, when you talk about marriage and to be specific an arranged marriage , i can only say one thing, it is your ability to accept the concept which in many ways stems from your upbringing, and peers. This difference, that i have from you, is what prevents me from being so optimistic. All around me, I have seen people, from my own parents to my siblings who have had a love marriage, thus, to me it is a scary proposition to go into something unknown, there is no reference, or place from where i can get any ideas, suggestions, or more simply learn.
I hope somewhere i can find it in my dealings to love a person not in the simplistic way .. that is love. Perhaps a greater amount of understanding an empathy is required to be able to love a man who i do not know that well.
I remember reading a book called Midnight's children where there is a point, where a woman falls in love with her husband, one body part at a time. It may sound crazy but to me it somehow made sense. When we fall in love we are taken up or bold over by the confidence, looks, intelligence and all that of the other person. But when you are married to someone and you see that person everyday, and slowly he grows on you.
I don't know whether any of what i said made any sense. Or may be you got terribly bored.
Y'day we had discussed to major issues, one about reading and second about love and marriage.
It is your observation about people reading too much that made me think. I wonder whether some part of my high expectation from life, stems from this belief that we deserve more. But again i may also argue that unless we expect more from life, the drive required to move in this world will be lost. However, the understanding of the difference between "expectation" as a motivational force and one as depressing has to be there. As motivation we must be driven to better things and goals, yet on achieving, or receiving something in life, the expectations should not get in the way of appreciating or being thankful for our gifts.
Secondly, when you talk about marriage and to be specific an arranged marriage , i can only say one thing, it is your ability to accept the concept which in many ways stems from your upbringing, and peers. This difference, that i have from you, is what prevents me from being so optimistic. All around me, I have seen people, from my own parents to my siblings who have had a love marriage, thus, to me it is a scary proposition to go into something unknown, there is no reference, or place from where i can get any ideas, suggestions, or more simply learn.
I hope somewhere i can find it in my dealings to love a person not in the simplistic way .. that is love. Perhaps a greater amount of understanding an empathy is required to be able to love a man who i do not know that well.
I remember reading a book called Midnight's children where there is a point, where a woman falls in love with her husband, one body part at a time. It may sound crazy but to me it somehow made sense. When we fall in love we are taken up or bold over by the confidence, looks, intelligence and all that of the other person. But when you are married to someone and you see that person everyday, and slowly he grows on you.
I don't know whether any of what i said made any sense. Or may be you got terribly bored.
Everybody's Free
to wear sunscreen)
Mary Schmich
Chicago Tribune
Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97... wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.
I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are NOT as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
to wear sunscreen)
Mary Schmich
Chicago Tribune
Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97... wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.
I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are NOT as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
Thursday, June 5, 2008
What's on your mind?
Whatever that is... don't worry coz life can't be worse than your worse fears. Stop freaking out ... Future's too damn mysterious .. to take a guess at, so, don't guess, let it be.... let it happen to u .. if u don't like it . change it.. but what's the point of worrying when it's like trying to solve a algebra problem by chewing bubble gum... there's no end to worry.
Life's cool... take it like cricketer's take their profession in India... one ride.. sometimes ur a hero .. top of the world... next game ur out for a duck, or floor a sitter from d best bat of the rivals.. they'll burn ur effigy, call for ur downfall.. but u got to know the truth.. u ain't changing coz it's not worth changing to suit what other's like coz.. simultaneously u can't make everyone happy ...
Remember: Being a good person is like being a goal keeper.. no matter how many you save, people will remember only the one's you missed.
Be the Devil and reign in HELL....rather than be a slave in Heaven....
Life's cool... take it like cricketer's take their profession in India... one ride.. sometimes ur a hero .. top of the world... next game ur out for a duck, or floor a sitter from d best bat of the rivals.. they'll burn ur effigy, call for ur downfall.. but u got to know the truth.. u ain't changing coz it's not worth changing to suit what other's like coz.. simultaneously u can't make everyone happy ...
Remember: Being a good person is like being a goal keeper.. no matter how many you save, people will remember only the one's you missed.
Be the Devil and reign in HELL....rather than be a slave in Heaven....
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